According to statistics, almost every single parent is convinced that they are doing the right job raising their children and teaching them lessons. But in fact, it’s not all that simple and smooth. Most of the time, adults can’t control their emotions and punish their children more than they deserve. This, in turn, has negative consequences for the children: they develop fears and stereotypes that make everything harder for them.
We at martzune.com are convinced that nobody likes punishing children, but sometimes it’s absolutely necessary. Recommendations from experts can help us deal with these situations, so we decided to share them with you.
1. If a child didn’t have bad intentions, they shouldn’t be punished.
Babies and toddlers are naturally curious. So it’s wise to eliminate temptations and no-nos — items such as TVs and video equipment, stereos, jewelry, and especially cleaning supplies and medicines should be kept well out of reach.
When your crawling baby or roving toddler heads toward an unacceptable or dangerous play object, calmly say “No” and either remove your child from the area or distract him or her with an appropriate activity.
Timeouts can be effective discipline for toddlers. A child who has been hitting, biting, or throwing food, for example, should be told why the behavior is unacceptable and taken to a designated timeout area — a kitchen chair or bottom stair — for a minute or two to calm down (longer timeouts are not effective for toddlers).
It’s important to not spank, hit, or slap a child of any age. Babies and toddlers are especially unlikely to be able to make any connection between their behavior and physical punishment. They will only feel the pain of the hit.
Most of the time, children aren’t trying to harm anyone, they just want to discover things. And when a child is just trying to learn, they should be supported even if their actions led to something bad. The same goes for situations that were complete coincidences. Sympathize with the child and tell them how to fix the situation.
When punishing children for accidents, parents risk raising an indecisive person. They can do things on command really well because they are used to behaving in the presence of someone powerful. But this adult can’t make their own decisions, and they are also not very responsible.